Why I Didn't Say

Most people never knew I was experiencing debilitating pain and fatigue.  Some have even expressed guilt as if they should have seen it, or frustration that I didn't talk about it.
I did talk about it...just not often.  Here's why.

• Nobody likes a whiner.
• Experience says most people won't believe or understand.
• I want what I say to be positive, encouraging, or at the very least, funny.
• I couldn't escape the anguish but I had the power to ignore it in conversation.
• The problem is so complex that the thought of trying to explain it seems overwhelming.
• Talking about it makes it "bigger".
• If I have time and energy to explain how I feel, I'd rather use it for something beneficial to my family.
• No matter how incapacitated I feel, the joy and hope I have in Christ Jesus is actually greater.

If you've been a friend but you didn't see the pain, ditch the guilt.  Nobody but God knows everything there is to know about anyone.  Just continue being a friend.
Having a diagnosis, an explanation for my inability to function at full capacity, is liberating.  It's not a psychological problem.  I don't have to explain how I feel, but you can get a pretty good idea if you visit  http://www.adrenalfatigue.org/ or read the articles and forums that come up if you Google "tired all the time".
I talk about it now because I can offer support to the "invisibly ill", and possibly even help them to be understood by the healthy population.  It's not all in our heads, people.  This is real.