Tradeoff

I seem to be trading off between having a little bit of energy but having deep sharp aches and pains in my joints and muscles, and having milder body aches but feeling drained and breathless.  While I would love to have boundless energy with no pain, this arrangement is much better than intense pain with a complete lack of energy.  I've done that before and I hope I never have to again.
For a month or so I've been in the mild pain but absence of energy mode.  It's so frustrating with the holidays coming because there are so many holiday preparations I want to do (not to mention yard cleanup and winterization) but I have to skip them in favor of the everyday basics--cooking, dishes, laundry, helping with homework.
I do have my children help as much as possible but they have their own chores, jobs, and studies to do too, not to mention their friendships and hobbies, which I believe are just as important.  Teenagers need downtime too.
My disappointment at having to skip some holiday activities isn't about meeting anyone's expectations or being perfectionistic.  We enjoy the holidays no matter how we spend them.  The disappointment is from skipping some of the simplest traditions, things I love to do, because I'm just too tired, and knowing that if I felt better, I could have kept them.
I've slept through the Christmas movies.  I've watched the girls decorate the sugar cookies by themselves because I'm too tired to participate.  I've said no over and over again to helping build the snowman because I can't handle the cold.
This year might be better.  We're still a few weeks away from Christmas.  And I'm not as sensitive to cold as I have always been before.  I might still sleep through family holiday movie nights, but if we have snow, maybe I'll be able to pitch (and take) a couple of snowballs.  Canning season is almost over, so I might have more energy by Christmas time, and, after this canning season, we have plenty of the very best for our holiday feasts.